Day Nine – Not taking them back

The alarm clock went off at 7:30am, as it has for the past several weeks. It did not wake us – we had been awake since about 5am, tossing and turning. Although the children have been to visit our house for the last few days consecutively, today had a very different feel about it.

I slid out of bed and made myself busy – it’s how I deal with things. By 8:30 the house was tidy, the washing up was done, the chickens had been fed, and I was showered and dressed. I made a cuppa and took it up to Wendy who had just thrown up from nerves.

After half a cup of tea each we set out for the foster carer’s house for the final time.

The rest of the day has unfolded thus far on autopilot. We have perhaps given a bit more input today than previously, but again that might be explained by this being the real “day one”. Paperwork was signed this morning – we are now legally responsible for the children. It feels very strange – we have no more hoops to jump through – no more tests to pass. We suddenly find ourselves in the middle of “parenthood”, and dealing with the every day decisions that all parents face.

This morning I walked into town and found myself being smiled at by the elderly checkout lady in the supermarket, when she saw that I was buying several children’s toothbrushes, children’s toothpaste, and various other child-centric things. It suddenly occurred to me that the contents of my shopping bag would look exactly like a potential kidnapper’s might – and became paranoid as I left to walk home.

Today is the first day I have really thought about the life we have left behind. Being “Me and Wendy” seems like such a long time ago now – it’s very odd.

This evening has passed (so far) without incident. We put the kids into bed at about 7 (led by the eldest, who we think was just excited about sleeping in the best bedroom they have ever had), and so far things are going well. The younger children are so far unaware that their night light is actually a baby monitor we borrowed from a friend. We can hear the goings on in their room. After a bit of whispering this evening they conked out – but not before we decided to switch the upstairs bathroom light off – it would appear that seeing the bathroom triggers an “I need to go pee” switch in their head, even if they only have a thimble-full to squeeze out.

Tomorrow night we may well wear them out a bit more before putting them to bed – and turn the routine they have known on their head. While in foster care, they had their bath in the morning to allow hair to dry easily. We will bath them after dinner to calm them down and wear them out. We will also start reading bedtime stories; something they have never experienced in their short lives thus far.

In a way the bedtime stories will be one of the most exciting times – to share our love of books and stories with them. So many great stories to tell – of pirates, princesses, ogres, heroes, villains, goodies, baddies, and of incredible adventures that we all take for granted. I have already dug out “Peter Pan”… it’s going to be an awfully big adventure.